Monday, March 29, 2010

Red Oval

Coming in over a month late (hey, it takes time to plot this out, research my beer, organize pictures, look at porn...uhh...I mean, write this out.  Yeah, thats it!) is my latest entry to my experimentation of the body, mind, and soul (less so with the soul...more so with the body...a little bit of the mind).  This time around, I decided to switch up game plans.  No more of these $10+ per bottle shit.  No sir, I'm going economical on your asses here.  Trader Joe's Red Oval.  Costing a whopping $2.99 for a six-pack.  Yes, indeed, I'm livin' the high-life!
The Beer:
So after my last foray into TJ beer stock, I decided to go back and try the opposite end of their selection's spectrum.  I went with Red Oval.  A working-man's beer if you would.  Perhaps not for the beer snobs out there as much as their for the brew dogs.  So what did I learn about Red Oval?  Well, for one, it's brewed in Wisconsin at the Minhas Craft Brewery.  You may remember them from such gems as: "Mountain Creek Classic", "Rockhead Malt Liquor", and "Wisconsin Club".  What's that?  You can't recall your last night out with a 40oz. of Rockhead?  That's alright...neither can anyone outside of Monroe, Wisconsin.
Joking aside, Red Oval wasn't all that bad for it's price.  Being a lager and of similar marketing and packaging to beers like Budweiser and Miller Lite, its not surprising that the taste was similar.  There was no discernible odor, a mild hoppy taste, and perhaps most surprisingly no lingering after taste in my mouth.  At under $3.00, I was just happy that it was indeed beer I was drinking and not barley-water (which I imagine would be the uber-cheap way of brewing by simply putting barley into water for an hour, chilling overnight, and serving).

The Buzz:
So the thing with cheap beer, is that they kinda skimp on the alcoholic content.  Having become accustom to high-priced, high-abv, high-falutin' craft brews, I forgot that the requisite 4 beer limit for this experiment wasn't going to have quite the same impact.  So, throughout the night, while being bored to death with the Winter Olympics, I put away 4 cans of Red Oval in a little under 2 hours and had nothing to show for it.  The buzz was barely noticeable and  I felt swindled out of my hard earned cash.  Then I remembered that I had only drank about $2.00 worth of alcohol.  Or the Los Angeles bar equivalent of a shot-glass of imported beer.  So, who was I to complain about the lack of buzz when from an economical standpoint, I was ahead of the game in terms of drunkenness.  That said, it took all my might to not finish off the six-pack and get something for my time's worth.  Fortunately, I had a friend over who dropped those extra two (and several high priced beers) before the women's downhill slalom finished.

The Hangover:
Going to sleep that night, I didn't expect any hangover whatsoever due to the fact that I wasn't drunk in any way.  I mean, how could you feel like shit the next day without feeling like awesome the night before?  It just wouldn't seem right.  Even so, I drank a full glass of water before I passed out just like the rules stated (granted, their my own rules that no one but me knows about, but rules is rules, yo!).  So when I woke up in the morning with a nasty taste in my mouth and tired as all hell, I was confused and upset.  A hangover?  From this?  You gotta be shitting me!!!  Since it was only 7am, I popped a few Advil, re-brushed my teeth, and headed back to bed for another hour or two of sleep.  By 9am...pseduo-hangover cured!  No bad taste, no fatigue, no nothing.  Just pure Sunday morning bliss!

The Verdict:
So, I went with the cheap lager this time over the expensive ale.  What did I get?  Just sub-par beer at a basement-level price!  Perhaps if I had finished the entire six-pack the brief, barely hungover symptoms I experienced would've been far worse.  But for purposes of this blog, I am NOT allergic to Red Oval.
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