Port Brewing Wipeout IPA

It's a brand new year with a brand new look on the blog. To start of 2011, I take a stab at a brew that was given to me as a gift from one of my oldest (and most intense) drinking buddies, the infamous Mark Burton Grez! Between a holiday visit in the pouring rain and a look at my new place with his parents, Mark managed to gift me with two bottles of Port Brewing Wipeout IPA - his number one favorite beer of late.

The Beer:
Holy hop Batman, this beer's got bite! So apparently Mark is a fan of hops. That's no surprise to me though, as the man has started growing his own at his house. It also makes sense considering the well-known fact that the hop plant and the cannabis plant are close cousins (seriously, not only is the hop plant a legal relative of cannabis, but it will get users reasonably stoned. If smoked in the form of a joint, the sweet-sour, flaky fruiting parts of the plant will produce a mild, grass like high accompanied by a feeling of peace and serenity), and Mark has long been a fan of nature's smokes. But enough about drugs, we're here for the beer! Wipeout IPA was a great beer with a thick head and smooth taste. The hoppiness of it definitely provided some intense bitterness, but it was balanced so well with the level of malt and carbonation that I didn't mind it so much as I have in other hoppy beers. According to Port Brewing, this beer mixed in "no less than five hop varieties including Amarillo, Centennial, Cascade, Simcoe and Summit." That's a lot of plant in a beer. But it worked. I wouldn't place this as high as other IPA's I've tried, but it certainly was quite tasty and I can understand why it's Mark's favorite.

The Buzz:
I decided to drink both bottles for this test, reserving a little from the second bottle to ensure that I not exceed my 48oz limit (although the bottles claimed to be 22oz, they were by far the largest 22oz bombers I've ever seen. I swear they were identical in size to Sierra Nevada's Estate bombers which come in at 30oz). After the first beer was finished, I felt completely fine. Measuring in at 7% abv, that didn't really surprise me too much. It's a respectable amount of alcoholic content but definitely not the heaviest or highest I've had in an IPA or even in an IPA for the purposes of this blog. However, by the time I was done with the second bottle - or atleast the amount I chose to drink out of the second bottle - I was rocked. Something hit me hard. And I liked it! The buzz was one of those "good time" feelings where you acknowledge that you're drunk but don't feel sleepy or full or angry or any of the other associated effects of a good buzz. Perhaps this goes back to the level and complexities of the hops and they're relation to weed. The feelings were similar in base, yet different enough in detail.  And again, it occurred to me that this all makes sense in respect to Wipeout IPA being Mark's favorite beer. If there was ever one person on the entire planet who embodied good times and legendary drunkenness, it'd be Mark. I could start a separate blog that'd take me years upon years to fill with accounts of his epic nights of intoxication. Without giving away too much or compromising any good standings, I'll just say that he ALWAYS fell asleep with either a beer in his hand or next to his bed...ALWAYS!

The Hangover:
Hangovers...always finding a way to fuck up a good thing! After finishing off my set amount of Wipeout, I opted for a small bite to eat. Some Whole Foods Kettle Corn in fact, along with a glass of water to wash it down. I put on some Howard Stern and promptly passed out popcorn in hand slumped over on the couch. After a few hours and a sore back, I awoke to realize that I never quite made it to the bedroom. So I finished my water, put the food away, brushed my teeth and popped some Advil before I went down for round 2. Cue the dogs a few hours later and I again woke up to let them out. Apparently at this point, the Advil had no effect on me as I had a headache that felt like I had drank some heavy IPA's and passed out awkwardly listening to some Stern. Once the dogs were done with their stuff, we all headed back to bed where I passed out for round 3 of sleep. One might think that all this up & down would only help my chances of shaking any possible hangover. Well, one would be retarded then. When I finally woke up for the day a few hours later, the headache was still there. It was coupled by the usual hangover nastiness: mild dizziness, fatigue, a little stomach pains, and total annoyance at the sunlight. Although I was feeling like a hideous monster being prodded with pitchforks, apparently my body was not producing any of the other symptoms that typically come with my suspected allergy to certain beers. My wife didn't notice any foul odors emitting from my pores, I was able to successfully drive (and shop) at Home Depot, and I didn't feel like I needed to be within sprinting length of a bathroom at all times. No, I may have been hungover, but I don't think I was allergic!

The Verdict:
And so, my first beer experiment of the new decade has come to a close. And with it, some interesting results. I discovered a hop explosion in a quality beer. I detected similarities and nuances between the iconic ingredient of beers around the world and its infamously controversial horticultural cousin. And just as infamous, is the provider of this months brew, who although hasn't exactly taught me anything about beer, he has taught me much in how one enjoys beer. And for that, I'm eternally grateful!

Anchor Steam Small Beer

This month I bring to you the final Beer Hates Me test of 2010. I've come a long way while growing, learning, and experimenting with different types of ales & lagers, porters & stouts, barleywines & dubels. So how do I cap off such a landmark year of alcoholic consumption? Why with the worst beer I've tasted all year! Cause I'm gangsta like that....bitches....

The Beer:

How could I have chosen so poorly? Sure, I knew that this beer was considered a “light” beer. Sure, I knew that it wasn't a special seasonal or limited edition batch. But it came from a very respectable brewery with a long line of quality beers and brewing methods from one of the great American cities - San Francisco. Anchor Steam Small Beer was very simply, horrible. It claims to have been brewed using a (practically ancient) technique that essentially uses the leftovers from a stronger batch to make a secondary, lighter batch. The English would refer to it as a Small Beer, and thus, that's exactly what Anchor Steam has done here. They take their Old Foghorn Barleywine Style Ale and try to duplicate that using the runoff mash and wort and wang and plonk. It's all really technical mumjo jumbo for brewers and guys at home who buy Mr. Beer and think they know their shit. Well, I wouldn't doubt it if Anchor Steam was really just claiming to know what they are doing and instead buying some Mr. Beer kits and letting their retarded, blind children have a go at it. Because despite the fact their website claims that they “believe you will find Anchor Small Beer delicious – similar to what modern brewers call a 'bitter'”, I believe that this tasted like crap and found myself cursing my inner soul for purchasing such ass beer for my last post of the year. Thanks Anchor Steam. You fucked me. You really fucked me you assbag.

The Buzz:

The buzz? Seriously? Hey, remember that first paragraph you just read about “The Beer”? Remember reading that? You may have sensed a bit of frustration, a tad bit of disappointment, a touch of anger in that paragraph up there. Well, you might as well re-read it because there is nothing to speak of in terms of a buzz for this beer. At only 3.3% abv and tasting like brewed asshole, it was basically like drinking really shitty water over the course of 2 hours. And not just like shitty water at a restaurant, but like shitty water at a Mexican restaurant in Mexico! And not the good, resorty parts of Mexico either. I'm talking the drug cartel border towns of Mexico with shit on the bathroom walls and beer that they piss in. And ironically, that is where this beer may have come from. Beer from a small Mexican town on the border run by gang cartels who own Mr. Beer kits that their blind, retarded daughters pee into. Thanks again Anchor Steam, you dick.

The Hangover:

Well, surely a beer that tasted shitty and gave me no buzz whatsoever could never give me a hangover of any sort, right? I mean, 3.3% abv. That's like cough medicine. Think again! It was like cough medicine made in that shitty Mexican bar I guess because I felt awful the next morning. Not the typical hangover per se. I didn't have the stomach pains/headache that normally come with a rough night of drinking. But rather, I was dehydrated and shaky most of the day. Running errands and driving around weren't the easiest things to do and the 80+ degree weather made outdoor chores and fresh air less than satisfying (not that outdoor chores or fresh air are ever satisfying when it's in the 80's mid-December). Regardless, any hangover from Anchor Small Beer should have come with a coupon for one of Anchor Steams better brews. And that coupon should have been delivered in an ice cream truck handing out beer floats from those tiny, blind, retarded, homeless Mexican girls. They fuckin' owed it to me. Them and Anchor Steam, you bastards.

The Verdict:

So what do I deliver as a verdict for this debacle of a test? Obviously it was a total failure as a beer to enjoy. It was a failure as a beer that'd get one nicely buzzed. And it went 3 for 3 in being a failure by providing a hangover the next morning. So, the bottom line is that I fucked up. Royally. Rather than seeking out a seasonal or varietal batch for this holiday post, I tried mixing it up a bit in experimenting with a light beer from a world-renown brewery thinking that at the very least I'd get some better insight into "light" beers. Little did I know that the results I'd get would be tragic and depressing. Anchor Steam, you really know how to rape a guys dreams of excellent beer, don't you? I suppose I should take some of the blame for this month's test, but seriously Anchor Steam, your all fuck-holes.

However, as a bonus for this commemorative post, I present to you a look at my holiday take of beers this year. There are some real select varieties in this group. And I have no clue when or where they'll be consumed. I do know, however, that they will be freely enjoyed without a thought of documenting them for this blog! Happy New Years alcoholics!

Lagunitas Brown Shugga

This month I'm going back. Way back. Back into time... Join me as I tackle the very first beer I requested and recognized as a craft brew. Curiously enough, this is a beer from the same brewer that I also recognized as being a stalwart of the hate that certains beers have on me. Lagunitas...you bitch! You lure me in with sideways glances and touches of greatness, only to leave me grasping for breath after a swift kick to the junk. Whatever did I do to you???

The Beer:

The year was 2004. It was New Year's Eve and everyone was heading to Catalina Island for a weekend of partying, eating, and drinking. A dozen or so friends rented a cottage on the island where we'd welcome in 2005 with a bang. Being a tiny island with limited resources, we opted to stock up on food & drink on the mainland prior to departure. My job was to secure a portion of the beer for the weekend. Rather than go the easy route and hit up the local 7-11 for 30packs of Bud & Coors Light; I ventured out to a newly found beer distributor to peruse their selection. After spending what likely appeared to be an eternity just staring at the wide variety of imported and domestic craft brews, a helpful clerk asked me what I was looking for. I told him my preferences and he went to the back to grab me a six-pack of Lagunitas Brown Shugga. He gracefully went on to tell me how this was the newest seasonal from the brewery and one of the hottest items on their shelves. Thinking that I struck rare-beer gold, I promptly asked him if they had another 6-pack to purchase. He told me there probably was and that he'd bring it up to the register. After stocking my cart full of other select beers both known and unknown, I checked out and headed for the island eagerly anticipating my newfound treasure. What I discovered was a beer unlike any I had ever tasted up until then. Technically considered a Barley Wine, I had no clue what or how these flavors could exist in a beer.

The Buzz:

Not only was my palate shocked by what it was experiencing, but apparently my body was equally surprised by how such a smooth drink could pack such an alcoholic punch. Prior to Brown Shugga, I had only thought of wines and liquors as something that could be high in alocoholic content. And due to my personal distaste for either of those drinks, I automatically equated high abv with harsh tastes. Lagunitas Brown Shugga was my first foray into a smooth, drinkable beer that could easily floor you before the 6-pack was done. But I was naïve and eager to impress those amongst me with my unique beer and sophisticated taste. Little did I know that this beer would also destroy me physically and...yes...even emotinally.

Fast forward to 2010 and my sensebilities and knowledge of beer has grown exponentially. I know good beers from bad. I recognize yearly from seasonal batches. And I appreciate flavor over intoxication. This time around, I knew what I was getting into with Brown Shugga. I knew the complex layers of dried fruit and bitter hops would coat my mouth with a thick slightly spicey finish. The dark copper color and light tan head poured perfectly into my glass. And being a Barley Wine, what better serving method than a stemmed wine glass. At 9.84% abv, I didn't expect to have the desire to drink more than the 48oz limit my test dictates. What I did't realize though was that my body would only need 36oz to feel as though it had had enough.

The Hangover:

For those of you who have yet to buy into the masichistic notion of this experiment, please allow me to present you with item #1 – my second foray into Lagunitas Brewery in less than a year. Why Lagunitas? Why? What did I ever do but sing your praises and accomplishments? What do you do that poisons me so? Although not quite as bad as the hangover from Lagunitas Censored Rich Copper Ale, I once again awoke early to a pounding headache and a burning stomach pain. Following suit, I fed the dogs, took some pills, drank some water and went back to bed. After a few hours I woke again to find that those symptopms from the early morning hours still lingered. And worse, my body felt as if it was exhausiting fumes of alcohol out of every pore in my body. A shower and coffee did help some, but not to the extent that I was comfortable to operate heavy machinery. So, after hopping in my truck and heading into work, I was sure some fresh air and a breakfast would do the trick. But alas, no aid was coming for me or my symptoms. Only time would heal these inner wounds. Only time...

The Verdict:

The best way that I can sum up this month's beer is nostalgia. Not only was Brown Shugga as good as I remembered, but sadly the hangover was just as bad as I recalled. Lagunitas is a brewery that I so badly want to be MY brewery. While others tout Stone, Pyramid, Sierra Nevada, or one of the other California microbreweries as their local favorite, Lagunitas was supposed to be mine. I found it back in 2004 and introduced it to my Michelob-swilling friends. I was ahead of the curve before I knew there was even a curve to be ahead of. But after two failed experiements this year alone --- coupled with the harsh memory of how Brown Shugga wrecked New Year's Eve so long ago, perhaps I'll have to move north and settle for Anchor Steam. Hmmm, maybe next month we'll find out if I do.

Sierra Nevada Porter

Welcome back to this month's spook-tacular edition of Beer Hates Me (see what I did there...cause it's almost Halloween. Spook. I'm a fuckin' literary genius!). As I write this, we are in the middle of some lovely Santa Ana winds in Los Angeles that are providing us with seasonal gusts blowing the leaves to and fro along with un-seasonal warmth that makes those winds feel like a dragon's fart after a burrito. But the current climate is drastically different from the what it was when I drank this month's beer, the simply titled, Sierra Nevada Porter.

The Beer:
A few weeks back, I was trying to determine what I should drink for another round of scientific intoxication, and I had the hankerin' for a smooth yet bold porter. Looking back on my previous experiments, I had not drank one for this purpose since the very first installment. So with a specific type of brew in mind, I headed out to the local BevMo in search of a worthy subject. After several minutes and many trips up and down the isles, I settled upon Sierra Nevada Porter. Now, I have a dubious history with Sierra Nevada. Many of their offerings in the past have not agreed with me nor my physiology. It's often been a brewery that I've strayed from knowing that I'd pay dearly in the morning for an evening of microbrew indulgence. But I had never tried their Porter and figured what better time to revisit an old foe then under the guise of social and scientific experimentation.
So how did the beer taste? In a word, awesome! It was a smooth, pleasant drink with wonderful vanilla and coffee aromas. The dark deep color with a perfect tan head made me remember that porters are probably my favorite of all beers. Some people out here love their hops. Lots of friends back east are lager people. But me, I'm a porter guy. Give me something dark and thick but not cloyingly sweet or syrupy like many stouts bring to the forefront. I want a smokey beer, and I can't think of many that deliver those qualities in such distinct and deliberate fashion as Sierra Nevada Porter does.

The Buzz:
Unlike most of my past beers dedicated to this project, this one came in a six-pack. Not a four-pack, not a pair of 22oz bottles, but an old-school, easy-to-carry sixer! While this was nice for a change, it did present the problem of over-indulging. Being the smooth, smokey goodness that this Porter was, the chance of going back for numbers 5 or 6 was a definite concern of mine. While this isn't a "chugging" beer (then again, what respectable beer is? We, gentlemen sip our beer with distinction and respect!), the drinkability was extremely high for me. Beers 1-3 went down relatively quickly.  Whatever I was watching was barely halfway through when I realized that I was basically done with my third beer. So, after a short break and a little snack, I popped open beer #4 and poured it into a glass to savor as I took my time enjoying all the notes and fragrances and aromas it presented itself with. Oh, I was also wasted! While not overtly high in alcoholic content (a modest 5.6% abv), the speed at which I finished 3 warranted the heavy and happy buzz I harbored. But the fourth bottle purposely went down slower. And as the fourth was going-going-gone, the desire for a fifth slowly faded away. Although I certainly could have finished another one (or even two for that matter), the brain and the body found perfect harmony and I was content to wrap up the drinking for the night.

The Hangover:
Ahh, the hangover. Perhaps my most anticipated yet. My history of bad reactions to other Sierra Nevada beers led me to suspect that I'd have a similar experience the morning after their Porter. I woke up early to feed the dogs with only a modest sense of fuzziness and discomfort. The headache had yet to manifest itself in the form of a migraine, and the stomach held strong without any sense of nausea. Still, to be safe, I popped my hangover cocktail, had a drink of water and returned to bed for a few hours. When my wife came to wake me later, I popped up out of bed and was ready for the day, nary a hangover in sight.  Could it be true? Did I find a beer that I loved AND gave my no ill side affects? And was it possible that this all came from a brewer that has shown me no mercy in the past? At the moment, it appears as though the answers to all those questions is a resounding yes! But despite my glee in finding a beer that agrees with me on so many levels, my first thought was to repeat the procedure. Do it again to confirm the results. In essence, go back to the lab!
But that's not gonna happen just yet. I have neither the time nor patience to repeat a test at this juncture in the process. Not when there are so many other beers to experiment with out there. I will, however, go take another look at Sierra Nevada's other offerings to see if perhaps my past horrors stem only from their signature Pale Ale and not their many other offerings.

The Verdict:
The verdict this month is that I am awesome! My autumn instincts told me that it was time for a Porter and I knocked it out the park with my choice of Sierra Nevada. Furthermore, I also conquered what I once considered to be a brewery that crafted their beers in such a way that I could never truly enjoy them without the fear of death the next day. Similar to the way Lagunitas beers have all provided me with painful hangovers, this month's test has reinvigorated that confidence to go back out and try a batch or two from them that I hadn't previously tried. All in all, this month may just have been the most successful experiment yet!

Corsendonk Pater (Abbey Brown Ale)

What better way to help relieve the record heat here in Los Angeles, then by conjuring up memories of this past weekend when it was less hot. And to do so, I bring you the latest and greatest installment of my monthly malty masochistic machinations (yeah alliteration!).  This month I decided to get away from the American craft beers that had been doting this blog and head back to some 750mL bottled Belgian ale. My random choice from the local BevMo, Corsendonk Pater (Abbey Brown Ale).

The Beer:
I think the first thing I can say in regards to this month's experiment is that I've grown as a beer drinker. I now know things I didn't before and acknowledge subtleties in the taste, texture, and aroma. I also can appreciate the finer things in life like cigars, brandy, and a good book. Walks on the beach are always nice, as are antique flea markets and bird watching. Occasionally, I'll enjoy an old jazz record on a Sunday evening by the fire. Perhaps I'll even break out Bill Cosby's "Fatherhood" just for good measure. Ahhhh, aging...ain't it grand!  Oh, did I forget to mention that I turned 30 a few weeks back. Yeah. Fucking aging! So, I jest about those finer points. Instead, I've enrolled in Muay Thai Kickboxing and have eaten more cheeseburgers this month than in the past several years. Yeah! Fuck aging!
But as for my brew o' the month, Corsendonk Pater was a great choice and I did notice those subtleties that I mentioned above. Which I can only attribute to my growth in beer and brewing. This brown ale poured nicely into my wonderful Trappist glass with a dark brown color and light bubbly head of foam. I immediately could smell notes of fruit and spice but the most prevalent aspect was the texture of the beer. It had a really light and carbonated feel to it. Knowing a little more from my tests, readings, and general inquisitiveness of beer, I'm sure this all stemmed from the bottle and brewing process. Unlike American craft beers that I've been sampling for the past several months, this one came corked and bottle-conditioned. Meaning that it was brewed with respect to its serving method. Much like the way Guinness cans their beer with a widget to help with cascading pours. Two full servings in the Trappist glass of Corsendonk Pater went down smoothly and swiftly. Well worth the price of admission!

The Buzz:
With a beer that tasted, smelled, and felt so good to drink, my hopes were high for the perfect buzz. Something that I could appreciate as a go-to beer when I was looking to celebrate a big occasion. An occasion, say, like a 30th birthday. Or perhaps something even more memorable...like...UFC 119. Well, wouldn't you know both those occasions happened in this past month. And while I opted for a plethora of specialty and craft brews on the big 3-0 at my local awesomeness-pub (The Daily Pint), I opted to celebrate the 119th UFC sanctioned pay-per-view fight with this Abbey Brown Ale. Boasting a respectful 7.5% abv and going down smoother than Billy Dee on a lucky lady circa 1979, one might think that this beer would've achieved its the perfect buzz-worthy-ness that I had hoped for. Alas, it was not to be. For whatever reason, I was barely phased by this Belgian brew. I actually wished for another after it was over. The combination of taste and refreshing palate had me yearning for more. And without a noticeable drunken state setting in, I was fairly confident that my body could handle it --- old age and all.  Regardless, this Dubbel style ale is one that I would certainly try again and again. And unlike it's celebratory counterpart, Mr. UFC 119, I was thoroughly pleased with the overall experience.

The Hangover:
Deciding to drink my beers on a Saturday eve while watching my monthly UFC pay-per-view has now become almost tradition. Doing so on a Saturday after having attended a grueling Muay Thai Kickboxing class during the day...not so traditional. My body was hurt and exhausted. But fortunately, none of the physical wear translated into physiologically. Perhaps it was the large Mexican dinner I had beforehand, perhaps it was the light and airy nature of the beer, or perhaps it was because I'm now officially 30 years old and have grown out of my pussy-beer-drinking phase.  But whatever the reason, there was absolutely zero point zero hangover symptoms. I feel asleep, stayed asleep, and woke up just fine. No need for even a hangover cocktail of meds. I more or less knew that I'd be ok with this beer. The lack of buzz seemed to solidify that notion. Now, I only wonder if another 12oz. of Corsendonk Pater would've changed this outcome. Perhaps I will have to explore that notion further with a follow-up test. To do so, however, would require finding this beer in smaller batches. Because if I was to buy two 750mL bottles, I certainly would find myself drinking both --- well over the allotted amount for these purposes.

The Verdict:
The second Abbey Ale in a row and one that is very closely compared to last months Ommegang pick, this beer couldn't have been any more different. From taste and aroma to drinkability and hangover, every aspect of Cosendonk Pater was the complete opposite my experiences last month. And all for the better. It truly may have been an instance of circumstances, or it may have simply been serving methods and bottling procedures. Whatever the factors were, this was a beer I truly enjoyed. And one that I'd like to enjoy again in the future. And unlike past beers that I've enjoyed through and through, there were no negative reactions the next day. While I'd like to chalk it up to my body and mind and soul aging properly, it's very likely this instance was just a birthday gift from the beer gods!

Ommegang Abbey Ale

Once again the end of the month is upon us and as I sit watching another episode of "The Great Food Truck Race" (a show I have a love-hate relationship with due to the fact that I pitched something like this to Food Network about 10 months ago only to be met with blank stares and suggestions to make it more like "Pimp My Ride for roach coaches" Braaagghhhh, stupid dumb damn TV execs!!!) I am writing this one one the fly - no drafts, no notes, no plan. This week I'm tackling a more well-known microbrew in Ommegang Brewery's Abbey Ale. In addition to the run-and-gun writing of this post, I've also added a new glass to my drinking arsenal. How can this not  be an exciting read!?!

The Beer:
Employing a brand new Trappist glass to maximize the taste, aroma, and colors of this fine ale, I found myself somewhat overwhelmed by the first few sips. Abbey Ale brought forth strong spiced notes and a slight woody taste as if it were aged in oak barrels (which admittedly, I have no knowledge of it is or not). It also presented itself with a strong taste of licorice. A taste that I'm not particularly fond of. A taste that was sticking in my mouth and my brain convincing me that I wasn't going to be able to get through the required 36oz (3 beers) to complete this month's experiment. But, like any good potentially-allergic-blogger, I soldiered on for you the reader! After the first beer was done, I took a short break had a few sips of water and poured the next one into the Trappist. While it could have been that my palate was now familiar with the wave of flavors about to hit it, maybe it was just that the second one got a better pour. I allowed the copious amount of foam to develop without getting too thick to drink. And beer number two went down much smoother and quicker than the first. Ok, perhaps all was not lost. Maybe this was a more acquired taste that would mean beer number three would be a home run. Well, instead of a home run, it was a Bill Buckner - complete flop and something I almost couldn't finish. I don't think it was necessarily a bad beer at all. In fact, I have one bottle left in the fridge that I anticipate having sometime later this week.

The Buzz:
So, much like the beer itself, the buzz from Abbey Ale provided complex results. I knew going into this month's beer test that I would be fighting fatigue no matter what I tried or when. It's been a hellish month of 60-hr work weeks leaving me completely spent by Saturday nights. But, with the support of a new glass to try out and a hotly anticipated UFC pay-per-view, I had hopes that I'd be able to push past that sleepiness and pound down the 4-pack. Unfortunately, that was not quite how the night went down. The glass lost its luster after its first two pours (also...it's a glass! Seriously, how much excitement did I really expect to get out of a freakin' glass!). Also, my go-to drinking event, UFC 118, turned out to be so boring that I fell asleep during the last fight (after the 3rd beer). The last, 5-round championship rematch fight! That's a perfect barometer of a) how boring it was, and b) how tired I was. Typically, in that instance I'd be going for that fourth beer excited that I had it reserved for events just as this. Alas, all I can infer is that the 8.5% abv that Abbey Ale packed was sufficient enough to knock me out before midnight.

The Hangover:
The mixed results that I had with both the taste and buzz from Abbey Ale decided to continue into the next day with one of the weirdest hangovers I can remember in quite some time. My hangovers typically manifest them selves as either a headache, stomachache, or worst-case scenario - both! This time however, it was like a pseudo-headache that felt like I was in an all-day fog. I slept fairly well having had my typical hangover cocktail early in the morning before going back to bed for a few hours. The absolutely bizarre dreams I had however, combined with sleeping so hard on my arms that I woke up to numb limbs, caused me to feel like I had just awoken from some deep, dangerous, life-altering surgery.  Half my body was on fire, while the other half was frozen. I couldn't mobilize properly and woke up to being more tired that I had felt in weeks. It was as if I had been up all night working out or getting beat on (which I suppose is possible if I was so passed out that my tough-as-nails Boxer, Murdoch, decided to walk all over me during the night). But the hangover stuck around until about 3pm when it finally dispersed only to reappear after dinner all over again. But it wasn't the worst hangover. It wasn't the pain of the Lagunitas Copper Ale or even the discomfort from last months Shipyard XXXX IPA. It was something different and foreign. I could deal with it well enough to function, I just wish I had had the entire Sunday to lay on the couch and watch old Jerry Orbach episodes of Law & Order. I miss you Lenny Briscoe...L&O hasn't ever been the same without you.

The Verdict:
After only having a few days to gather my thoughts and post this blog, I have to say that Ommegang's Abbey Ale fell into the middle of the craft brew pack for me. It clearly was a mixed bag for me. In taste, buzz, and hangover, my body and brain couldn't get on the same page as this American Belgian Brew.  I think that I'd certainly try other selections from Ommegang's brewery. They do hail from one of the greatest American towns, Cooperstown, NY. And they are known for award-winning Belgian Ales here in America. But on this particular day and this particular test, I have to say that they didn't quite make it to my list of awesomeness.